1964…The birth of GI Joe and Vietnam
As the oldest Boomer boys (nee 1946) hit draft age. Coincidence?
1964: Bob Hope entertained happy troops in Vietnam on his Christmas Special, and Santa left an amazing new toy for younger Boomer boys under the tree… GI Joe and all his Friendly Fire Accessories. Joe (like Barbie) appeared as a realistic, grown-up doll, except for the absence of reproductive gear. But, Joe’s huge guns (a Freudian cure for feelings of inadequacy) dwarfed Wyatt Earp’s, so he, unlike Babs, found a release for his sexual frustrations.Follow-up from Bob: Did George W. Bush own a GI Joe?
Greg: Of course! When Sears published the 1st GI Joe ad in 1965 (below left) Little Dubya circled his fav in red crayon…and dreamed that one day he would become…(right)…just like Poppy!
.Bob: That explains a lot, but GI Joe is ancient history.
Greg: Think so? Click here to check out a brand new (2009) straight-to-DVD “Catapult-the-propaganda” GI Joe movie: The Rise of Cobra.
Obama upsets American War Profiteers and they asked Joe to promote their 2012 candidate.
Below left is the Baroness from Cobra…Does she remined you of anyone?
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…and, speaking of airheads:50 years ago…The birth of Barbie and credit cards!
As the oldest Baby Boomer girls (nee 1946) entered teendom. Coincidence?
.ABOVE LEFT: 1959 First Barbie, Mastercard and Visa. RIGHT: Barbie 2009
In 1959 the Toy Industry drooled as they recognized the gigantic new puberty market of Baby Boomer kids…record toy sales for the past decade, and Mattel didn’t want to lose their best customers.
Barbie was hatched that year, and Boomer females have never been satisfied with their bodies since. Babs transcended dollhood and became a lifestyle, a role model to help adolescent girls make the painful transition to adulthood. Barbie possessed everything an All-American girl could possibly desire: a perfect face, figure, hair, a fabulous wardrobe and an ideal boyfriend (Ken). Barbie was the first doll with boobs, which seemed natural, since the sale of training bras increased by 50% in 1959 as the oldest Boomer girls turned 13 and began to notice serious changes in their anatomy. How could they compete with Barbie? At full scale, Babs’ measurements would have read: 40DD- 18- 26. Her breasts defied gravity and stuck out, high and well formed (and nippleless), and her exaggerated, hourglass waist could only have been achieved in the real world by the removal of a few ribs and vital organs. Barbie’s long, slender legs must have been achieved in a month on the Gitmo torture rack, or as the result of some terrible disease (which also caused her nipples to fall off?). If a real woman owned a full-scale figure like Barbie’s, she would be the most popular photographic subject in medical journals since the Elephant Man.
Nonetheless, every little Boomer girl in America simply had to own a Barbie and as many accessories as her parents would tolerate. Mattel’s production line could barely keep up with demand. They started the Barbie Fan Club, and soon membership exceeded that of the Girl Scouts of America. Each subscriber received regular fan club letters with tips on how to become an all-American Dream Girl, and a complete shopping guide of the latest additions to Barbie’s wardrobe. Teenieboppers dropped all other dolls and concentrated on helping Barbie get ready for her next big date with Ken. In fact, Barbie’s entire schedule consisted of getting ready for dates, shopping, trying on new clothes and experimenting with new hairstyles and makeup. It is interesting to note that 1959 was also the year that Visa and Mastercharge cards were introduced.
Barbie’s life was not cluttered with any visible signs of education, marriage or career (until 1985, with Barbie’s “Home Office Center”), but no one seemed to wondered where she got all the money for her beautiful house, swimming pool, spa, horse, snazzy sports car, and more than a thousand expensive outfits. Perhaps Barbie was the mistress of a very wealthy man? What other job could she possibly qualify for that could earn her enough to maintain her luxurious lifestyle? Closer examination will dispel the mistress theory, however… Mattel neglected to provide Barbie with the physical equipment necessary to perform the duties of such an occupation. Ken has been the only guy to date Barbie during the past half century because he, too, has nothing going on below the waist or above the neck.
This vain, self-centered, materialistic, hollow-headed, sexless, cold, plastic princess served as the adult role model for little girls throughout the entire history of our generation. On her twenty-first birthday in 1980, 112 million Barbies had been sold…one for every American female.
With Barbie as a role model for little girls, and GI Joe for little boys, it’s amazing that the Baby Boomer Generation turned out as well as it did.
Published by Greg at 05:22 AM on February 12, 2003